THE BIBLE, DATING, AND MY FATHER.WHAT TO DO? CHRISTIAN OPINIONS?
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So I'm ideally wakeful the bible has no indication for dating, and which the closest thing they have to it was the duration in between rendezvous and marriage. My father has not long ago used this evidence to contend which until I'm ready to get tied together i do not need to be dating, and afterwards he contingency be the one to select my partner. (I'm sixteen going on seventeen subsequent month by the way). However in this day and time which is really unrealistic. By the time i am ready to get tied together i wouldnt need his approval.That is no longer the law here in 2008. And im am flattering certain this is not his genuine reason for not vouchsafing me date my boyfriend. He has altered his reason a million times on the subject.
1st i only couldnt date the man i longed for to since of his race. afterwards it was since i wasnt grown up enough. Next he told me my hormones were out of carry out and which i didnt need to be dateing. Now the beacuse im on a silppery slope…what slant i dont know, and hasnt been suggested to me by him.
i only feel similar to it is really foolish of him to discuss it me which i only cant date at all. As a flourishing follower of Jesus teen i hold it would be some-more unpropitious to keep me in a burble and afterwards recover me with no training or guidence on the theme in to a college enviornment, than to let me begin going out with the conflicting sex.
I have seen a direction in my family. The father/mother is despotic and doesnt let ther teenage daughter date, go out, etc. when the daughter gets on her own, what happens? she engages in permarital sex and in the future becomes pregnant. it happend to my mother, my aunt and my cousin.
I personally, hold as a seventeen year old comparison i am old sufficient and grown up sufficient to date, and i have exhibited majority in most ways my father chooses to ignore. I am receiving all AP classes, i am a pickle A student, fool around for 3 church choirs, sing, fool around the piano, violin and guitar, and have a part-time job. I have rubbed my resopsibilites and should be since a small bit of freedom. I have found a really good guy, which i feel is honourable and i would similar to to date him. Ive well known him for 3 years and im flattering certain i know him well enough. since shouldnt i be aloud to date him?
my father has met the man before, hes been to the residence ( not in the i wish to date your daughter sense).I have no enterprise what so ever to rivet in fornication, and am not nieve sufficient to put my self in a incident which would concede which opportunity.
So wats the problem?
what is your perspective on the theme of dating and my situation?
how could i remonstrate my father he has zero to be concerned about?
i have oral to my mom on the incident and she has certainty in me and what i wold her about the situation. but she has no contend so in this household. my father acts as tyrant of the lives flattering much….he was indignant with her and myself since we saw nothin wrong with haveing a boyfriend. ( he held me at the bowling alley with my bf…we were JUST bowling haha). he was so indignant and began dishing out assorted punishments which did not proviso me. O only did what ever he told me to do with out protest. his annoy escalted so far as to kicking me out of the residence since i "refused" to follow his rules
7 Comments
November 18th, 2010 at 4:53 pm
Their house, their rules.
Sorry, kiddo — when you become a parent yourself (hopefully after you're married), you'll understand how they were trying to protect you.
November 21st, 2010 at 1:48 am
If you are really a "strait A student," I'm worried about your school.
But in any case, perhaps you could speak with your preacher, and have him speak with your father. I agree that there is no reason to forbid any and all dating at your age.
November 22nd, 2010 at 2:32 am
In the bible the daughter just gets dad drunk on wine and takes advantage of him. No need for dating.
November 23rd, 2010 at 8:27 am
Ask him this: "The Bible also says that if I talk back to you, you have to kill me."
Or: "Why do you pick and chose which ways of life from the Bible I have to live?"
November 24th, 2010 at 7:55 pm
lol about the slippery slope.
Laugh it off.
Have your boyfriend- I guess you just can't go on dates. Talk to him at school and on the phone.
You're almost 18.
Don't "move far away".
Keep in mind he means best- fathers often go wrong when they mean well. (it sets u up for more disappointment/bad decisions for you to not get practice dating now)
The whole business about picking ur partner- ludicris.
Are you of a different nationality than American? i know that;s practiced in some other countries.
Where is your mother?
Surely she can relate and step in to help your case.
Good luck:)
November 27th, 2010 at 5:14 am
"I have seen a trend in my family." Your father is trying to stop the trend, so he's over protective.
"how could i convince my father he has nothing to worry about?"
No guarantees, but I think your best bet is to not argue about it, but focus on:
1 Timothy 4:12 Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
You know what? I wasn't restricted from dating. I had one girlfriend in high school. After we broke up, I didn't date for about 6 years. I prayed that God would point out who I should date before I dated again. In the meantime, I would do things with girls and be friends, but not date. It worked well. I'm sure it's hard, but It will work out well for you also.
November 28th, 2010 at 1:17 am
I am sorry that is happening to you and how you must feel angry at your dad. The first thing that I think you should do is pray about it. Ask God to give you the strength and the wisdom to deal with this particular situaion. I also think you need to ask God to reveal to you exactly why your dad is like this. Perhaps he might feel a little afraid that you are growing up too fast or he is afraid that somebody might try to take advantage of you and hurt you. I think also that your father is prejudiced and that is why he acts out even more on you. In the meanwhile I suggest that you can talk to a youth leader in church and explain to him about the situation and ask for his advice and prayer.